Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
WHAT THE FUCK JASON, WHY IS THERE A FREE BLOW JOBS BY LISA SIGN IN MY FRONT LAWN WITH MY PHONE NUMBER ON IT?! PEOPLE ARE PULLING INTO MY DRIVEWAY!
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
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