Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
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