Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize
