btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
I just realized that my phone was set to Brazilian time...what the fuck happened last night
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
You came home with a traffic cone and said, "this is my birthday condom."
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize
