cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
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