he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
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