I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
Randomize
