he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
today i learned why jack sparrow loved rum so fucking much
You are two creepy Justin Bieber quotes away from me not talking to you for the rest of the day
If I had a pelvic thrust emoticon, I would use it
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't make this awkward for me. Don't let your mom come near the bathroom. I can't meet your mom for the first time while I'm shitting. Dont make this awkward.
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
Woke up with a lip tattoo that says "fake news" in case you're wondering about my wellbeing
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Excuse me. I’m a mature responsible adult.
You got your arm stuck in a vending machine trying to get fruit snacks.
I had a cast on my hand and if I paid for my fruit snacks, I’m getting my fruit snacks.
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