I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
Randomize
