If i come over, it means nothing
Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize
