I woke up fully clothed on top of my sheets and i didnt even pee myself..so proud.
If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
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