you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
Randomize
