I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
no one ever believes me when I try explaining to them that your straight. I'm all like, "yeah that's his girlfriends dress he's stretching out"
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
It says something about our relationship that he stole your phone to tell me about his dick at 3am and neither of us realized that wasn't you until just now
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
Randomize
