Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number
I wish i was in the wii world.
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
Randomize