Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
Dude. My tinder just blew up in Seattle. I'm moving here. I don't give a fuck
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
I woke up at 4am because the neighbors cat managed to sneak into my bed. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
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