Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
ok so I'm texting you now like I promised instead of drunktexting aaron and telling him how badly I want his cock tonight. aren't you proud?
this is Aaron, hi
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
Made eye contact with a friendly neighborhood dog walker while violently puking out the window. How's your Wednesday going?
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
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