I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
Randomize
