im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Randomize
