grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
high people should be assigned attendants
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
The cops high fived after they tackled you
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
Randomize
