Whatcha textin bout Willis?
Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
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