You got in a fight last night?
Yeah! Some dude in the bathroom...he was standing there and I notice he's got the same shirt as me on so I'm like...dude you should have called me, we look like idiots...he didn't say anything...so i got pissed and hit him...completely decimated and my hand was all bloody and covered with glass afterward...weird dude, never saw him again that night or since.
Um...Did this guy happen to look almost exactly like you?
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
They asked me to help them shop for lingerie.
Tell them everything looks awful, makes their ass look fat, etc. You'll wreck their self esteem and likely both have sex with you to make themselves feel better.
You're the most understanding sister I could ever ask for.
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
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