what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
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