I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
You just can't finish a sentence that starts with "I may have drunk peed in the bed" with "do you mind if I skip work and sleep here?" Anyways, yeah still drunk at work.
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
Randomize
