I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
We told the pizza man that the door was most likely unlocked, he could leave the pizza on the counter and give himself 20%. He did it-I'm never moving out of Aspen.
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
Please say a prayer for the elevator people at work today. My farts are significantly more potent the day after hitting that korean place for lunch...
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
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