Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
I twisted my ankle while drunkenly playing in my adult kickball league. Now I'm having to use my grandpa's cane to walk at this party. I am so single.
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
Randomize
