I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
you're hired as official boob wrangler
I swear to god if I have to repeat this to you one more mother fucking time I will flip fucking shit and acidic rain will pour down upon your mother fucking soul
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
Wait wait wait. You are actually taking advice from this lunatic?
This is the girl who got a balloon full of cocaine through security no questions asked. Of course I'm taking her advice.
Valid.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
Randomize
