I wanna bring you to show and tell
"I want to just tie you up so you\'ll still be here like this when I get home." Actual words.
just took a cab, driver just asked what i'd been drinking- i said vodka, he said "can't do vodka-drunk, it makes me feel like i'm giving birth to myself" ...no comment
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
Shame is for Republicans.
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