You picked the wrong day to call in sick. She's wearing the librarian glasses today.
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
Randomize
