do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
COOKIE DOUGH CUPCAKES ARE A THING
Did you really just send me a blank text in response to news as awesome as that?
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
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