i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
Randomize