Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
My sheets look like a crime scene.
rough night. sneezed a watermelon seed this morning and apparently I drunk dialed my boss for a ride home. twice.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
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