Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
I just watched a trucker jack off to a picture of Ellen DeGeneres at a truck stop in Nebraska.
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
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