why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
The maid of honor just puked.
I left my keys in the garlic bread freezer in Publix.
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
Her Grandmother felt me up AND paid for dinner. If she doesn't get her shit together I'm gonna be her Step Grandfather.
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
