just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
im having a threesome with these popsicles
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Randomize
