haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
Is it bad I'm drunk at orientation
You've been there for 12 hours, what are you supposed to be doing
Not be drunk
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
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