You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
wow bdsm is so cute
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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