I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
i spelled "betch" that way on purpose, don't question my abilities as a drunk texter
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well we were just driving down the street, there was a realtor and a couple walking up the porch of a house for sale, mark sticks his head out, opens his mouth to say something, pukes all down the side of the car, pauses, and yells "THIS IS A PHENOMAL NEIGHBORHOOD YOURE GONNA LOVE IT"
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
Lexi was drunk enough at 2pm to say "fuck tom brady and fuck you too" to literally every person at the store in Pats attire.
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize