We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
Randomize
