Do you still have your period?
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
This strange Italian man told me he wants to take me for ice cream and kept calling me "tomato" from tinder
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
Randomize
