call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
Randomize
