can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
when I woke up she was standing in the living room with a bottle of scotch because she is "allergic to hangovers"
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
Randomize
