I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Randomize
