The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
So hungover. Have a black eye from where I tried to brush my teeth and stabbed myself in the eye instead. Should make the performance review I was stress drinking about go so much better.
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
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