like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Driving to get a preg test with my ex, wearing my unicorn hat
You are so not ready for motherhood
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
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