i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
Randomize