The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
Her cat was breathing in my ear all night, like that kid from Hey Arnold.
Randomize
