you know you've been playing too much mario kart when you see a curve in the road ahead and see yourself drifting around it
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
Randomize
