finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
he kept opening the car door while we were ON THE HIGHWAY and insisting he could walk. next time i drive my boss home at 3am i'm putting the child lock on
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
third nipple confirmed
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
Randomize
