you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
Because when I say 'You shouldn't drink anymore', she hears, 'I personally challenge you to chug 3 more mixed drinks'
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
Randomize