There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
Randomize
