we have officially lost it.
So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
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