you know your drunk when 7 soccer players cant catch up to a tranny in high heels who just stole your wallet
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
